Norma was one of those rare individuals who seemed to have a natural gift for connecting with others. Her interpersonal skills were exceptional, and she exuded warmth and professionalism. As the assistant customer service manager, she was already a powerhouse in her role—delivering outstanding customer service, managing teams with ease, and creating positive experiences for clients.

When Norma confided in me that she wanted to make a move into Human Resources (HR), specifically in training, I wasn’t surprised. She had all the qualities that make a great trainer—communication skills, empathy, and a deep understanding of customer service, food safety, and health and safety practices. As my time in the UK was drawing to a close and I was preparing to return home after completing my studies, I was tasked with finding my replacement. Encouraging Norma to apply for the HR training role seemed like the perfect next step for her.

Norma went through the application process and, unsurprisingly, she nailed the interview. Her experience and skills made her an ideal fit for the position, and soon she was taking on responsibilities in HR, transitioning from customer service to training with remarkable ease. The topics she was most familiar with—customer service, food safety, health and safety—were the core of the training programs, so she already had a solid foundation.

But despite her success, I noticed something holding Norma back. Even though she was excelling, she consistently sought my approval. Whether it was a training session she delivered or other related deliverables, she would always look to me for validation. While it’s natural to seek guidance, especially in a new role, I realized that Norma’s self-confidence was tied too closely to my presence. She needed to trust in her own abilities, and I needed to help her step into that confidence.

I made a conscious decision to step back. I took a month-long vacation, leaving her to manage things on her own without my input. I knew she was more than capable of handling the responsibilities, but she needed the chance to see that for herself.

When I returned, I was delighted to find that Norma had truly thrived in my absence. The feedback from colleagues was glowing. Norma had finally stepped into her role fully, without needing my validation. She had grown into the confident, self-reliant professional I always knew she could be.

By the time I resigned and returned home, I was proud to see Norma confidently leading the training discipline, and the transition had been seamless. She had become everything I envisioned—a fantastic trainer, a capable leader, and someone who trusted in her own abilities.

Key Lessons:

Encourage Self-Reliance: Sometimes, the best way to help someone grow is to step back and give them the space to discover their strengths. Confidence comes from doing, not from constant reassurance.

Trust in Potential: Recognize the hidden talents of those around you. Offering encouragement and opportunity can bring out the best in people, allowing them to rise to challenges they may not have initially believed they could meet.

Mentorship Isn’t About Control: The role of a mentor is to empower others, not to create dependency. True mentorship means giving people the tools and confidence to succeed on their own.

Create Opportunities for Growth: Allowing someone to operate independently fosters growth and self-assurance. Sometimes, people need to be free of oversight to realize their full potential.

Celebrate Independence: Watching someone succeed on their own, especially when you’ve been part of their journey, is one of the most fulfilling aspects of leadership. Empowering others to thrive is the ultimate success.

This experience taught me that sometimes, all it takes is a little distance to help someone grow. Norma found her confidence, and I found joy in knowing that I had played a small part in her transformation.